Ἀγοράστης
εὖ γε, ὦ προφῆτα ἢν δὲ πρίωμαί σε, τίνα με τὸν τρόπον διασκήσεις;
Διογένης
πρῶτον μὲν παραλαβών σε καὶ ἀποδύσας τὴν τρυφὴν καὶ ἀπορίᾳ συγκατακλείσας τριβώνιον περιβαλῶ, μετὰ δὲ πονεῖν καὶ κάμνειν καταναγκάσω χαμαὶ καθεύδοντα καὶ ὕδωρ πίνοντα καὶ ὧν ἔτυχεν ἐμπιμπλάμενον, τὰ δὲ χρήματα, ἢν ἔχῃς, ἐμοὶ πειθόμενος εἰς τὴν θάλατταν φέρων ἐμβαλεῖς, γάμου δὲ ἀμελήσεις καὶ παίδων καὶ πατρίδος, καὶ πάντα σοι ταῦτα λῆρος ἔσται, καὶ τὴν πατρῴαν οἰκίαν ἀπολιπὼν ἢ τάφον οἰκήσεις ἢ πυργίον ἔρημον ἢ καὶ πίθον• ἡ πήρα δέ σοι θέρμων ἔσται μεστὴ καὶ ὀπισθογράφων βιβλίων καὶ οὕτως ἔχων εὐδαιμονέστερος εἶναι φήσεις τοῦ μεγάλου βασιλέως. ἢν μαστιγοῖ δέ τις ἢ στρεβλοῖ, τούτων οὐδὲν ἀνιαρὸν ἡγήσῃ.
Ἀγοράστης
πῶς τοῦτο φῂς τὸ μὴ ἀλγεῖν μαστιγούμενον; οὐ γὰρ χελώνης ἢ καράβου τὸ δέρμα περιβέβλημαι.
Διογένης
τὸ Εὐριπίδειον ἐκεῖνο ζηλώσεις μικρὸν ἐναλλάξας.
Ἀγοράστης
τὸ ποῖον;
notes
Diogenes explains his method of training to the prospective buyer.
εὖ γε: "well said!"
ἤν: "if" (+subj.) (a contraction of ἐάν, which is itself a contraction of εἰ ἄν). Lucian uses this form often and it appears later in this section. Attic Greek also uses ἄν, which is another contraction of ἐάν (the alpha is long in ἄν) and it should not be confused with the modal particle ἄν which has a short alpha. Τhat ἄν is used in the potential optative as well as in certain types of conditionals and the modal particle ἄν is what contracts with εἰ to yield ἐάν/ἤν/ἄν.
τίνα τρόπον: "how" (adverbial acc. expressing manner: S. 1608).
πρῶτον: "first" (neuter adj. used adverbially to express time or a succession of events: S. 1611).
σε...ἀπορίᾳ συγκατακλείσας: "after enveloping you in a state of lack." Diogenes is suggesting that he would enclose the buyer in a state of neediness or lack through a rejection of material comforts or of anything Diogenes deemed luxurious (such as money, a bed, etc.).
σε...καθεύδοντα...πίνοντα...ἐμπιμπλάμενον: the acc. participles further describe the implied subject of the infinitives πονεῖν and κάμνω (the subject was already specified with σε near the beginning of the sentence).
καὶ ὧν ἔτυχεν ἐμπιμπλάμενον: "filling up on the things which happen to be around." This is a kind of shorthand for καὶ τούτων ἃ ἔτυχεν ἐμπιμπλάμενον. The expected object of ἐμπιμπλάμενον would ordinarily be in the genitive, as is common for verbs of filling, but here it is omitted. You might expect the relative pronoun to be in the nominative as it is functioning as the subject of the verb ἔτυχε in the relative clause but ὧν has been attracted into the case of the missing (but easily supplied) antecedent. See S. 2509 for the omission of the antecedent to a relative pronoun and S. 2522 for the attraction of the relative pronoun into the case of that missing antecedent.
τὰ δὲ χρήματα: "and as for money, if you have (some)." The object of ἔχῃς is here placed outside of its clause at the very front of the sentence for emphasis (hyperbaton: S. 3028).
ἢ καὶ πίθον: "or even a storage jar." Diogenes Laertius preserves many anecdotes about Diogenes' refusal to follow societal conventions including even the seemingly basic practice of living in a house. See D.L. 6.23 for Diogenes sleeping in a pithos housed in the Metroon, a temple in Athens that also served as an archive for the city).
ὀπισθογράφων βιβλίων: "scrolls written on both sides." A biblion is literally a strip of βύβλος or papyrus. Scrolls were typically only had writing on one side and so this is presumably a typical gesture of frugality on the part of Diogenes.
οὕτως ἔχων: "and while being in this state" (ἔχω with an adverb expressing a state of being).
εὐδαιμονέστερος εἶναι φήσεις τοῦ μεγάλου βασιλέως: "you will think that you are more fortunate than the great king." Despite the fact that this is indirect statement, εὐδαιμονέστερος is nominative because the subject of the infinitive and of the main verb are the same (S. 1973). The "great king" is a common title for the king of Persia, a proverbial figure of wealth and luxury in the minds of the ancient Greeks.
τούτων οὐδεν ἀνιαρὸν ἡγήσῃ: "you will regard none of these things as troublesome." τούτων is partitive gen. (S. 1341) and ἀνιαρόν is attributive modifying οὐδέν (LSJ ἡγέομαι III.2). This is the apodosis of a future more vivid conditional with the dual protasis supplied by ἤν...μαστιγοῖ...στρεβλοῖ (for the future more vivid cond. see S. 2323 and for variations on that conditional, see S. 2324-2328).
πῶς τοῦτο φῄς τὸ μὴ ἀλγεῖν μαστιγούμενον;: "how do you mean this, namely that my being whipped does not cause pain?" The articular infinitive is here used in apposition to τοῦτο as a way to further explain it (common when the preceding word is a demonstrative (see S. 2035 and S. 1987). Keep in mind that the infinitive is considered a neuter singular noun and so can function as such (S. 2025) and the definite article makes clear the particular case and hence the construction clear. Here the articular infinitive is accusative in apposition to τοῦτο. The articular infinitive is regularly negated by μή (S. 2028) and μαστιγουμενον is accusative as it is specifying the subject of the articular infinitive (modifying an implied σε). The whole clause (τὸ...μαστιγούμενον) serves to explain τοῦτο but also to restate with some surprise the unlikely idea that being whipped would not cause the buyer any pain.
οὐ...χελώνης...τὸ δέρμα περιβέβλημαι: "I am not encircled in a tortoise shell..." (i.e. I am not protected by a tortoise shell). The perfect tense emphasizes a completed action resulting in an enduring state of being (S. 1852b). τὸ δέρμα is an acc. of respect (S. 1600).
τὸ Εὐριπίδειον ἐκεῖνο ζηλώσεις: "you will try to equal that Euripidean saying" (neuter adj. functioning as a substantive).
μικρὸν ἐναλλάξας: "after revising (the saying) a little bit" (adverbial acc. expressing measure or degree: S. 1609).
vocabulary
προφήτης, -ου, ὁ: interpreter, promoter
πρίαμαι: buy
διασκέω: train, instruct
παραλαμβάνω: take charge of, receive, assume the care of (+acc.)
ἀποδύω: strip off, strip away
τρυφή, -ῆς, ἡ: softness, luxuriousness
ἀπορία, -ας, ἡ: difficulty, lack of means, neediness; perplexity
συγκατακλείω: shut in, enclose, envelop
τριβώνιον, -ου, τό: a little threadbare cloak (diminutive of τρίβων, -ωνος, ὁ)
περιβάλλω: throw around, clothe one in (+acc.)
πονέω: work hard, toil
κάμνω: toil, suffer, be weary (from hard work)
καταναγκάζω: force, compel
χαμαί: on the ground
καθεύδω: lie down to sleep, sleep
ἐμπίμπλημι: fill, eat one's fill
λῆρος, -ου, ὁ: nonsense, chatter
ἐμβάλλω: throw in, toss in
γάμος, -ου, ὁ: marriage
ἀμελέω: have no care for, be neglectful of (+gen.)
πατρῷος, -α, -ον: of one’s fathers, ancestral
τάφος, -ου, ὁ : tomb
πυργίον, -ου, τό: tower
ἔρημος, -η, -ον: desolate, lonely, abandoned
πίθος, -ου, ὁ: jar, barrel
θέρμος, -ου, ὁ: lupine (plant of the pea family)
μεστός, -ή, -όν: full of (+gen.)
ἐυδαίμων, -ον: fortunate, wealthy
ὀπισθόγραφος, -ον: written on the back and the front
βιβλίον, -ου, τό: scroll, tablet, book
μαστιγόω: whip, flog
στρεβλόω: twist, stretch on a rack, torture
ἀνιαρός, -ά, -όν: painful, troublesome, annoying
ἀλγέω: feel bodily pain, suffer
χελώνη, -ης, ἡ: tortoise
κάραβος, -ου, ὁ: crayfish
δέρμα, -ατος, τό: skin, shell
περιβάλλω: throw around, encircle, surround
Εὐριπίδειος, -α, -ον: Euripidean
ζηλόω: emulate, imitate
ἐναλλάσσω: change